8 minutes!
BBC, traffic controller
Don’t let this man into the party
Oops you did, you sold your soul
This is not the greatest post in the world
No, no, this is just a rebuke
I couldn’t remember the greatest post in the world
This is just a re-byeeew-ewewewk
I am not an athlete
I am not a professional athlete
Piers Morgan is not a football guru
He’s a one man protest march
A spam man junk dissenter
With a bellyache full of Arsene Wenger
If Sepp Blatter can govern a public body
Then go figure, Piers, strut your stuff
And Fivelive 606 will lap it up
Eyes on the road, Beeb!
8 minutes of prime time for ‘Sir’?
You boiled that kettle for too long you old Stooge
Lord forbid that the public liked his Hot Air Borealis
Piers Morgan’s verbal planking gets the Beeb’s vote (shortened version)